people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
