I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
