Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize