She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
He told me they were just razor bumps!
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
