I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
He's on the porch naked. Help.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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