I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
