he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
