have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Soap is not a condiment
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
