Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Randomize