Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
