Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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