butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
