Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
