I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize