I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I have fence marks all over my body
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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