Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Someone came in the potted fern
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
