Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
accomplished twins. life is a go
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
