VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
