Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
