We're like a lot better than the average bears
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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