They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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