He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
