One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize