Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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