Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
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