D3 body, D1 cock
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
