After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
