Got a toothbrush?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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