oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
