we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Randomize
