i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
