yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
