We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize