so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I'm passing your future prison.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
