I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
