I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
