Buhtt sex?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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