All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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