physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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