I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize