What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
