You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
