i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
What changed your mind?
Being sober
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize
