is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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