im drinking this country out of the recession.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
