I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Randomize
