she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
