while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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