I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
