Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Nicole vs. Life
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I want her autograph on my taint
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
